A picture of a nautilus shell cut in half with an ever decreasing spiral shape Anxiety is a hot topic and there are numerous reports that it has been on the rise in Kiwi kids and kids all over the world. https://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/schools-ease-nz-childrens-epidemic-of-anxiety/23SW2OAQZ45E3FHZFBDQYPB6KE/ Negative associations with anxiety include, a sign that a person is not coping … Continue reading How to help your anxious child
Defiant boy
I need help with my son who is defiant, rude and out of control. Everything is a problem, he won’t do anything I ask and fights every request with a lot of strong push back. The defiant outbursts are affecting everyone in the family and I have had enough. Whether it’s doing his chores or … Continue reading Defiant boy
What to do if you disagree with your partner on how to discipline your child
My partner and I disagree on what to do when our child has very challenging behaviours like threatening us, throwing things and shouting. Dealing with the behaviour is bad enough. On top of that I am feeling exhausted and worn down because my partner and I disagree on the best way to discipline. The main … Continue reading What to do if you disagree with your partner on how to discipline your child
Getting a united front in parenting
Have you ever had a moment when your child makes a poor choice and you can't agree with your partner about how to deal with the problem? It can be really frustrating when we can't get a united front or agree about how to discipline our kids. It's major source of stress in relationships and … Continue reading Getting a united front in parenting
Prepare for school in a pandemic
Families will prepare kids to go back to school on Monday next week. What challenges will our children face going back? How will they feel and what will they do with their emotions? These are some of the questions I am reflecting on as I think about how families can best prepare for the change. … Continue reading Prepare for school in a pandemic
Looking after each other
Parents right now are adapting to very different circumstances. We feel a lot of emotion. We feel the responsibility of looking after each other. There are benefits from our being at home and we feel challenged by the uncertainty of what happens next. On a daily basis we balance our needs as parents and those … Continue reading Looking after each other
Routines during Covid-19
Sleep The amount of sleep we get and whether we feel refreshed can make or break our day. It can be a battle to get off to sleep when we are feeling uncertain about the future. Even though we all know how important it is to keep a good sleep routine, it’s never popular to … Continue reading Routines during Covid-19
We all want grateful kids
Recently a parent raised the question of how she could encourage her children to be more grateful; "My kids get so many things and never seem to be that grateful for them". Is it realistic to want kids who are grateful? This question is loaded with an expectation. The expectation is that our kids should … Continue reading We all want grateful kids
Help! My strong-willed child won’t take “no” for an answer
Parents of a strong-willed child can wonder how they will get through the day when everything feels like a battle. It feels like our child is in charge. Getting even the tiniest amount of cooperation seems impossible. Our strong-willed child is determined and won't take "no" for an answer. This can leave us feeling frustrated, … Continue reading Help! My strong-willed child won’t take “no” for an answer
Why punishment doesn’t work
“The dominant problem with parenting in our society isn’t permissiveness, but fear of permissiveness.” This idea put forward by Alfie Kohn in his book “Unconditional Parenting” is as valid now as it was when he wrote it in the early 2000’s. He warns against the dangers of over-controlling and punishment. Fear or permissiveness holds us … Continue reading Why punishment doesn’t work