“The dominant problem with parenting in our society isn’t permissiveness, but fear of permissiveness.” This idea put forward by Alfie Kohn in his book “Unconditional Parenting” is as valid now as it was when he wrote it in the early 2000’s. He warns against the dangers of over-controlling and punishment. Fear or permissiveness holds us … Continue reading Why punishment doesn’t work
This week I received an email from a parent that made me say "wow". "There are no more meltdowns." This is not a statement to be rushed past. This is a family in which people have strong feelings. They are not "YES" men or women. I am certain everyone is still this way inclined. Even … Continue reading Why I do what I do
When your child or teen is exploding around your ears the last thing they need is a parent who joins in. It’s like pouring petrol on a fire. Parents are well aware of this already but isn’t it just SO HARD to be the flexible, understanding adult some times? Keeping calm when our buttons are … Continue reading Help there’s fireworks in my house!